No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
Randomize
