I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
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