i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
Randomize