ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
Randomize
