all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
