am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
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