he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
Randomize
