"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
Randomize