i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
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