how can u be prego again
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
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