You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
