dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
Randomize
