on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
time to smoke my breakfast
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
Randomize
