i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
Randomize