Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
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