I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
