Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
How many fucks given?
0.12846
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Question: anytime during the past week did I drunk dial you and give you full permission to grab my boobs? Cus I know I said it I just don't remember who I said it to...
Randomize
