he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
Randomize
