How was your Memorial Day?
Don't remember... but I do have an American flag painted on my boob signed by a Staff Sargent... Oh God, I hope that's his military rank and not a nick name.
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
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