He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
