Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
Randomize
