Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
I supernannyed him into submission
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Randomize
