I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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