I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
Randomize
