Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Randomize
