win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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