Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
Also, apparently I'm only coherent when I'm drunk sexting. And then I'm grammatically perfect and impressively eloquent.
Randomize
