I'm drive I can fine osifer
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
Randomize
