Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
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