Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
On a side note...my DUI lawyer just snapchatted me. This is the exact moment in time when I realized my like IS a joke.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
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