just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
Randomize
