The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
She made me pour olive oil on her.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
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