He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
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