How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
Today I ate a sandwich and half my molar fell off, feels like a semi sprayed into my jaw.
I wish i was spraying into your jaw.
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
I just gargled with NyQuil
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
