fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
it was like his penis was on wheels.
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
Randomize
