I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
She needs sedatives and a leash
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
Randomize
