I'm having a debate with **** over whether or not he is gay... what's your verdict?
GAY or at the very least bisexual.
His "joking around" with all of his roommates is clearly as act. He needs to step back and reevaluate his sexual orientation.
Weird... you've rode him.
his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
Upon further investigation it turns out it wasn't blood, but chocolate frosting from the cupcake I shoved in my pocket to "save for later"
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
Randomize
