I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
Randomize
