so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
Randomize
