As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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