i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
Randomize
