Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
You want to complain about your sex life to me? Right now mine consists of trying to masturbate lightly enough not to wake her up with bed shakes. Go. Fuck. Yourself.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
Randomize
