Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Randomize
