Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
they need to just BURY HIM!
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
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