physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
Randomize
