now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
Randomize
