That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
Be still, my beating vagina.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
Randomize