I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
Randomize
