i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
Just had to reach into my sister's bag and shut off her vibrator so my parents wouldn't hear it. I am the world's greatest brother.
So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
Randomize
