wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
Randomize
