so explain again why im purple
no
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
Def don't remember taking those pics I sent you...but it looks like I was in a car? Shit. Looks like my Uber passenger rating just went up exponentially.
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
Randomize